Keep the Cap Off the Toothpaste

Keep the Cap Off the Toothpaste by Karissa Cole

All I can say is, most of my evenings don’t go quite like this.

As I was getting ready for bed I noticed a tube of toothpaste had somehow fallen to the floor. Not thinking too much of it, being very familiar with random acts of gravity already, I picked it up and started to put it away. While doing so I noted it felt heavier than toothpaste really ought to. I began twisting the cap off to investigate when I felt something pushing on it from the inside. Suddenly the cap flew off and skittered across the floor, and out from the tube emerged something I never expected to see anywhere, especially not inside my toothpaste. Covered in the sticky white goo was a tiny, furry bipedal creature.  From what I could tell he had a large head and a lanky body, although given that his slightly matted fur was sticking out at every conceivable angle, it was hard to tell what he might have looked like on a normal day.

Assuming being trapped inside toothpaste wasn’t normal.

Taking two big gasps of air, he scrambled out of the tube and hopped lightly onto my table. I couldn’t help but stare at him as he tried in vain to shake off the glop. A few bits of his tiny face a body were somewhat clear, though, and I could now see his fur was a soft, charcoal grey, he had no discernable nose or ears, and most of his head was taken up by his eyes and toothless mouth. He tried for another minute to clean himself off before he seemed to register my presence, despite the fact that I was hovering right above him. He looked up at me with enormous, shiny yellow eyes, thanked me for helping him get out of the tube, and then asked me if there was someplace he could freshen up. Somewhat dazed I pointed him towards the bathroom sink. Smiling he ran excitedly over to the edge of the sink and grabbed a few drops of water that remained from the last time the faucet was turned on. Although still being utterly spellbound by this almost microscopic being, I felt it would be inappropriate to watch as he cleaned his fur off, so I turned away. Shortly after doing so, though, I heard him call out a last cheerful thank you, and before I could even turn around he was gone.

I looked around for him for a couple of minutes, wishing to ask him a plethora of questions and thinking nothing with such tiny legs could have gotten too far. But he seemed to have been in a hurry and left no trace. So I went to pick up the toothpaste cap that had been ejected halfway across the room. But as I started to screw the cap back on, I thought better of it and instead left the cap off and just laid the tube down on the counter.

Because you never know.

  1. Aww, the creature sounds so cute! Have you thought about crocheting one? I think I’m going to. ;) Your stories are always so awesome!

    • Thanks! I hadn’t given that much thought, actually, until just recently. But I think I ought to. Glad you like my stories! Thanks again! :)

    • juno
    • February 16th, 2016

    In Fallout 4, a random security guard walks up to you and says “I broke up with my girlfriend – she kept the cap off the toothpaste. You know who does that?: A Synth!”.

    I googled for an explanation and found myself reading this and now I’m left with even more questions than before.

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